Another journey

For one accustomed to finding comfort in words, lately I find them evasive- hanging on the peripheral, just out of grasp. Yet I taste them lingering on my tongue as they melt before the breath that would birth them audibly. Ancient words which return with the sweetest memories, redemption, justification, calvary. I wish I could explain to someone what I can only feel shifting inside me, a cavern being hollowed out, a canyon carved deep inside.

The answer to the question I'm always asked seems to deflat people, I am greeted with disinterest since I've become unimpressive, my travels momentarily ceased (at least on the outside.) But, the current is changing and as Amanda so aptly said, "everyone our age is at a crossroads." I've went on a hunt today for The Journals of Jim Elliot and Keith Green's No Compromise- I find myself, or at least my longings, scribbled between the pages. "I ask not for a long life, but a full one."

I want silence lately, every time I turn on music it irritates me. I'm in a sensitive state- a hard decision before me.